Hello again myg0t, I hope your beds are places of family fun and frolics. We have a new guide for you and we'd like you to drag your testicles over it and tell us where it tingled most. This is the 14th guide we've made so if this isn't fucking funny we should stop now.

 

Let us know what you think.

 

A LOLOKAUST GUIDE TO ABORTIONS

 

The worst thing a man can hear from his beloved is “Honey, sniff sniff, I’m pregnant, we are going to be having a beautiful baby!” She probably thinks getting herself pregnant is the best way to keep you to herself. Perforating the condoms with pins and secretly coming of the pill are classic methods of ruining your life but these days we have a secret weapon, THE ABORTION!

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/ripped_out.png

 

 

Diamonds might be a girl’s best friend but an abortion is a trusty stead in a moment of panic to restore a man’s life to balance and equilibrium. We are going to show you how to take care of unwanted babies.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/banner.gif

 

 

Throw away your condoms and pump away comrades! The age of the abortion is upon us which means no longer do you have to sacrifice that wintastic feeling of barebacking her without a hat on. Bang her and fire as much protein shake up her snatch as you like, it doesn’t matter because you can make her have an abortion.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/pump_away.png

 

 

What if the dumb fuck wants to keep it? Well get ready guys, there’s going to be tears and screaming but you have to be strong and make her understand it’s all her fault. True, it takes two to make a baby and a good shot of baby batter from your creamstick, but it’s her responsibility to take the morning after pill to kill any life in inside her.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/your_fault.png

 

 

THE METHODS

 

So what are the ways of killing the unborn? Spin the wheel is the answer to that one, there’s so many to choose from. Some methods you can do together as a family and some need to be booked at the local butcher’s shop. Regardless of the method you choose, it can be a great night in or a fun day out. One method would be to just stab the cunt to death and get rid of them both.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/stab_cunt.png

 

 

SUCTION ASPIRATION

 

Well this is pretty much a vacuum cleaner only 30 times more powerful. They stick a suction tube with a scraping tool on the end of it up her foof and press play. If they forget to numb her first, you can have a good wank to her screams as all the fragmented foetus and placenta fly up the tube.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/dialation_abortion.png

 

 

DIALATION AND CURETTAGE

 

This is pretty much as above except the end of the sucker is a sharp slashing and cutting tool which hacks the unborn up so it exits more easily. One problem with this is it can cause damage to her box, resulting in a nasty infection and causing her to become a liability as opposed to a washing/fucking machine.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/dialation.png

DIALATION AND EVACUATION

 

After about 12 weeks the fucking sprogg will start to grow so they need to call in Mr Scissors! A sharp pair of forceps is wedged up her to tear the baby’s limbs off so they can be pulled out. After the arms and legs are in the trash the head is crushed and pulled out. When all that crap is out of the way the torso and other gooey bits are ripped out. Looks like sushi.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/abortion_scissors.png

 

 

PARTIAL BIRTH ABORTION

 

This ones great as it’s used when the baby is fully formed. Using forceps they drag the child out so that only its head is wedged up the trout’s mouth, the rest of the baby is dangling out of her whilst it’s still alive. Using a pair of scissors, (yes Mr fucking scissors again) a cut is made at the base of its skull. The brains are then sucked out causing instant death, allowing it to be removed in one piece.

 

http://lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/partial_birth.png

 

 

CHEMICALLY INDUCED

 

CONTRAPTIONS! CONTRAPTIONS! Yes filling her full of some kind of pharmaceutical wonder drug can cause the birth to start immediately. They say the contractions can be so violent that they decapitate the baby as it comes out. If it manages to survive that, there’s a good chance you’ll get to see it drop out of her fur burger and break dance on the doc’s operating table as it gasps its last breath. Now that’s a fucking show.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/chemical_abortion.png

 

 

SMOKE, DRINK AND TAKE CLASS A DRUGS

 

That’s not hard as they are three things we all enjoy doing. Getting wrecked every night and filling one’s blood with toxins will poison the critter. Heroin, excessive alcohol and some Cuban Cohebas should do the trick..

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/drug_abortion.png

 

 

 

GOAL KICK

 

It’s the World Cup final and you have to take the penalty shot that could win the tournament and immortalise you and the team forever if only you kick the ball hard enough. Actually, it’s your pregnant fuckbuddy and you’ve got her tied to a tree with her legs open. You know what to do, take a good run up and swing that leg like your life depends on it. Splat!

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/goal_kick.png

 

 

TOW ROPE

 

If your car gets stuck in deep mud then a tow rope is what you need. A pregnancy is very similar to a stuck car in the sense that you got to pull the cunt out. Loop the rope round the kid and as your driver hits the gas, jump on her guts. It’s head might get ripped off but at least its dead.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/car_abort.png

 

 

COATHANGER

 

A homebirth classic, this is a simple method where you stick a sharp metal object up her minge and thrash it around till stuff starts dropping out. This is cheap, safe and painless.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/coathanger_baby.png

SPADE

 

Who like gardening? Yes, me too. Lay the bitch out on the floor and dig the little bastard out through her stomach. After you’ve managed to dispose of the miniature, use the mother’s hollowed corpse as a grow bag for your tomatoes.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/spade_chest.png

 

 

 

SNATCH AND GRAB

 

Keeping things simple can be the best way. Most girls like to be fingered and this is similar except your whole arm goes up her meat chute. Slide your hand up and push past any resistance. When you get about elbow deep you should be at the right place. Now grab as much as you can and pull your arm out. Your unborn should now be disposed of or made into a shake.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/snatch_grab.png

 

 

PINCUSHION

 

If you put your hand on the mother’s stomach you might feel or even see the baby kicking, it’s an amazing feeling to think theres a life in there. Now you’ve located the child stick it with a collection of kitchen knives and kill it.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/stabbing_pregnant.png

 

 

 

THE AFTERMATH

 

After it’s all over you can look back and reminisce about your experience. A good idea would be to keep a reminder of your adventure and keep the dead baby. Get an airtight jar and fill it with formaldehyde, then put the baby in the jar for a nice mantelpiece feature or a great paperweight. Why not buy it a Christmas present every year like a new jar or play the home video of its execution on its birthday and watch it together as a family.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/foetus_jars.png

 

 

Don’t forget the grandparents. Take it round so they can see the grandchild they never had and remind them that their family line won’t continue, but will end in a glass jar. Smash the jar over one of their heads and make the other one eat the corpse. Show them the other ten jars of the other aborted children they’ll never see grow up and save their grief and misery for your wank bank.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/baby_jar.png

 

 

 

COT DEATH

Every man has his moments of weakness and you might be stupid enough to actually let her talk you into keeping it. Even if the creature’s room is decorated and occupied it’s still not too late to abort. There’s a few cheap, fun and quick ways to get the fucking thing dead.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/cot_death.png

 

 

You got to be a man of action and get your shit locked down quickly before anyone gets used to having ideas about keeping it, you got to kill it quick. Get a shoe in and stamp the bastard to death but just make sure you do the job properly so the docs on the ward don’t bring it back to life.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/stamp_baby.png

Camping and cooking round a fire is a great way to get in touch with nature and… yes, fuck that, just find a private enclosed location to spit roast it for about nine hours so it’s cooked through. Stuff and apple in its mouth and herb stuffing up it’s ass to maximise favour. Drink red wine and enjoy your miniature long pig before you celebrate with a nice fuck.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/bbq_baby.png

 

 

You’re flicking your bean and all you can hear is the fucking baby screaming its head off. The fact you haven’t fed it in three days might be the problem so you are going to have to take a break and shut it up. Baby food is specially formulated to give it all the goodness and nutrients to help it grow big and strong. Dog shit, broken glass and drain cleaner are the three main ingredients of good quality baby food so get it fed and carry on.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/feeding_time.png

 

 

After the baby is born you will suffer from stretch marks, saggy tits and a body so awful, a necrophile wouldn’t fuck you. Waste no time, tone up again. Boxers have the most ripped bodies of all sportsmen so take up the training regime of a boxer. Hang your newborn from a rafter like a punch bag and give it everything you’ve got until it’s reduced to a bloody rag. Bare knuckle training with rings on your fingers will reduce your baby to bits in no time at all.

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/baby_punch.png

 

 

 

CONCLUSION

 

Abortions are funny, sexy and a good excuse to watch some dude in a white coat fuck your girl with a vacuum cleaner and a toolkit. The DIY option allows you to enjoy a bit of mutilation, screaming and role play. This is a new age, an age where the consequences of our actions are no longer a worry, no longer a problem. Choose life, choose an abortion!

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/conclusion.png

 

 

 

http://www.lolokaust.com/pics/abortion/swinger.gif

 

 

Project director:

Jewdozer

 

Text:

Jewdozer

 

 

Art:

Ajaa

Bftony

Cumbutcher

Hashmere

Homodozer

Jewdozer

JonEvil

Nyaa

Smilecythe

Any good?

only irresponsible men and women need to have abortions performed

Funny if you're a neckbeard creep I guess.

creep

while i was driving home today, i saw this little nerdy kid came out of a martial arts class with his daddy looking all happy and i thought to myself life is beautiful :emot-wooper:

Does Lolokaust have a fanbase outside of myg0t? Just wondering...

Funny if you're a neckbeard creep I guess.

 

what kind of lameo faggots still inhabit myg0t? You are a faggot.

 

fFs

 

i can't be bothered to read the text but the images are a kind reminder, and i thank you for sharing them

 

;636753']while i was driving home today' date=' i saw this little nerdy kid came out of a martial arts class with his daddy looking all happy and i thought to myself life is beautiful :emot-wooper:[/quote']

 

Cool! Tells usnext time you see a plastic bag floating in the wind

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

look, Homo sapiens sapiens evolved with rape as part of the standard instinctual repertoire. This is a scientific reality which I encourage you to investigate, you will be surprised how much rape played a part for our distant ancestors and thus must exist as a foundational element in our current permutation. For some members of the animal kingdom it seems as if the male's entire purpose besides self preservation is to prove to himself to the FEMALE that he is worthy of mating. Whether it be a courtship dance, the plumage of a peacock, the alpha male domination of a silver back, the one worthy of breeding is clearly delineated in the social hierarchy.

 

 

With Homo sapiens sapiens the social battles are not fought for or because of women, but for and because of his rank among fellow M3N.

 

 

It has been demonstrated that men respond more strongly to signals of disgust from other men, and almost not at all from women.

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2572192/

The implication, that a man's status among other men is more important, are a reminder of how little women "matter"

 

As far as babies go, it has also been demonstrated that the brain of the male Homo sapiens sapiens responds differently to the sight of an infant than does the brain of the female.

http://www.hhs.gov/news/healthbeat/2008/11/20081111a.html

 

 

 

http://lolokaust.com/guides/abortion%20guide/abortion.flv

Pay attention at the 13 second mark.

I don't suppose you have a link where you copy pasted that from do you? I was hooked.

original content

:emot-jackoff:

Edited May 13, 201113 yr by rainbow brite

a fine read

Bravo herr jewdozer :emot-coolfish:

I think women should be loved and treated with respect

knobjockey;636844']I think women should be loved and treated with respect

 

i am not a spiritual person but i think the 3 major religions have the most wisdom in their instructions with dealing with women, especially Islam

 

if a woman wants a divorce you can kill her, if she cheats you can throw acid on her face or kill her, if she is a slut you can kill her, you get to marry teenagers throughout your life as the old ones get ugly, you can stone them to death if they talk too much etc.

i am not a spiritual person but i think the 3 major religions have the most wisdom in their instructions with dealing with women, especially Islam

 

if a woman wants a divorce you can kill her, if she cheats you can throw acid on her face or kill her, if she is a slut you can kill her, you get to marry teenagers throughout your life as the old ones get ugly, you can stone them to death if they talk too much etc.

 

I can agree with some of that you know, No one wants to put a ring on no ho's finger.